01/31/13 helping hands

last night i went out with some old friends and some new acquaintances. they, like myself, are aspiring musicians. chasing a dream down a long, emotional and seemingly impossible path. they expressed their desire to play music, embrace their camaraderie and have fun, over making large sums of money. this is a great attitude to have, because if you're getting into the business for money or ego padding, you won't last long. this meeting brought about some really interesting Q&A, as well as realizations on my part. this said band and i have known each other for a quite some time now, it would have been easy for them to just ask me to "do this" for them. (although i would have probably said no because it doesn't work like that. even if i wanted it to.) instead, we all sat down over a beer and they asked, how do WE do this*? how do we do that? they didn't ask for favors or handouts, they asked for knowledge and advice. it's very much like the old saying: "give a man a fish, you feed him for a day. teach a man to fish, he eats for a lifetime." everyone seems to have forgotten this. bands constantly want this and ask for this and want me to do this... i'm not a fanbase. i'm not something special. i've spent my life preparing for this opportunity and greater ones. i'm still chasing my own dreams. i've given up nearly EVERYTHING i have for this dream and i have no regrets, but even if i COULD put someone on a fast track, why would i? don't you want to earn it? don't you want to build an empire? this goes for more than just bands. people in everyday life want everything and everything handed to them. knowledge is power. it holds keys to all the doors. if there's one thing you need in this world besides knowledge, it's imagination. it's ok to ask questions. learn. apply. don't ask for "the fish". protect and prepare yourselves. someone will always be there to help. i know i always will, just as so many were for me. dream impossible, work hard and chase those dreams, and remember it's ok to ask for advice or help once in a while. (that said, the first time you ignore advice, get burned, don't expect to keep coming back.) be respecful of people and their accomplishments and work hard for yourself. the world will work it out. much love to you all. have fun out there. laugh, learn, love and LIVE.

01/29/2013

Finally home for a hot second. I can't express how much leaving this place has made me miss and love it. The album is coming along great and I'm thankful everyday that I get to play drums, travel and create/inspire as a profession. Being home reminds me of growing up and dreaming of the seemingly impossible. All the things I never noticed that subconsciously influenced my future. The little things that were instilled in me at such a young age that now are the pillars of my personality and life. My work ethic, respect of elders, superiors, and peers; getting up and appreciating the sunrise or a walk in the rain.... The small things that we forget. This is where I learned to dream and work hard, the two biggest contributing factors to everything I do. Spending time with family and talking about past, present and future, expressing my dreams and future plans, always learning. It's great to be home. Family is a strong part of my love and determination. They've always been there for me. Thank you. Speaking of, time to go hang with my mommy, visit my grandma and cool for the auntie. Go out and experience life, laugh, learn, love, live.

01.19.2013

today has been pretty fantastic. lots of great things happening in my world; hockey began today, drums are finished on all 14 songs, management is here and loves the new songs (that never happens haha), had a double dose of crossfit WODs today (Helen and Grace), things are going well. it's a great reassurance that if you work hard and fight for what you believe in, things will EVENTUALLY start going well. we all face dark and hard times, just keep grinding! that said, i know a huge reinforcement of my upbeat and positive attitude is attributed to dreaming, chasing those dreams, and staying healthy. when i exercise physically and challenge myself mentally, i feel the most satisfied. it's a constant challenge - work - get better - win philosophy. i love waking up, getting into a workout, reading about happening and news in my general interests and staying on the contant movement of learning. to me it is my drive and inspiration to stay working and stay happy. i wish you all the best, i strongly recommend taking part in daily exercise, reading, and dreaming. chase your dreams. don't ever give up. time to watch some NHL - GO WINGS.

01.17.2013 CONSUMERS.

woke up today to multiple great texts/emails. not a better way to start the day than reading or hearing good news before i'm even out of bed. most of it was related to dreams of mine and my loved ones. i can't say enough how excited i get when i see people chasing and succeeding their dreams. when you love something so much and you've given up SO much for it, then the payoff... such an awesome feeling.
after waking up i embarked on a little personal adventure today, walking around downtown Chicago and enjoying the view of Lake Michigan. something to be said about getting away, surrounding yourself with good vibes and listening to some awesome music. todays collection: Kanye West Pandora, gearing towards his 808's and Heartbreaks album. artists like Bruno Mars, Kid Cudi, Maroon 5, Kanye, The Fray... definitely one of (if not) my favorite genres. it got me thinking about my love for music all over again and why i do what i do.
i frequently will, for no reason, challenge myself intellectually to question things i see/read/believe in. today, i found myself discussing (with myself) how music is recently so different than other forms of art. when you look at a painting, you don't always, or maybe ever, hope for it to be repetitive, patterned or predictable. why do people want music that is all those things? the same drum beat, a repeated chorus, the same song, played the same way over and over.... i'm not saying i'm anti these traits at times either. but why have we created so many "rules" to popular music. seems sad. you have to play the same drum beat for every verse? for ever chorus? it needs to have some uniformity? unless you're in a prog or math-music band and you're goal is to constantly challenge yourself at all times. but why can't i just "jam" on a song. play what i feel. record it that way, play it different every night, just let me breath. something to think about. art and today's consumption of art, and most things, have become so watered down. we don't want to THINK about anything. just consume. food, beer, wine, music... we want it faster and cheaper... but what about better? what about quality and art and not following the same path, everyday, just being a sheep to EVERYthing. i understand conformity is neccessary in life, but not for EVERYthing ALL the time. think about it a little. challenge yourself. SLOW DOWN and laugh, learn, love and live.

Jan 16. 2013. Finished. Moving On.

today was a monumental day for me personally. for year i've given everything i have in me to chase a dream. i've sold literally everything i own, left my family, friends and past relationships behind. i've missed weddings, births, deaths, parties, birthdays and graduations. i've suffered blisters, broken fingers, and bloody 'everything'. i've given this dream all i have. and i'll continue to do so... but today was a huge step towards that dream. today i finished laying the drum tracks on the new Pop Evil album.
this is the first place i met with the band after "joining". today is a huge step in making my presence felt and known in this band. i never really felt not a part, but this takes my love and dedication to a whole new level. i'll be able to walk into Best Buys, etc, and look and see an album there that i played on. i made noise, wrote and worked HARD on. it's a huge feeling of accomplishment for me.
being in a band, especially a touring band, is NOT easy. on top of all the stuff i have previously mentioned, we have to get along haha. imagine having 10 people living in your house. now make your house the size of a school bus. now take away the privacy of your own room. take away ALL privacy. now spend 300+ days a year in that home. that's what we do... and i love it. this is my dream. and i will not stop until i've reached my goal(s), and when i do, i'll already have new ones set and be in stride chasing them. i'll never quit, i'll never give up. today is one big step in accomplishing a large part of my goal(s). life is great. Laugh, Learn, Love, and LIVE. don't ever EVER give up.

Jan 15 2013. Back at it

after an awesome weekend, we're back at it in the studio. we watched lots of football and most importantly, spent some time with close friends and family. when you choose a path like the one i live, it can get lonely. it can feel like people that once mattered forget you when you're not around, and the people that now seem to care don't really know the real "me". it can get difficult. old friends get jealous, start their own lives and/or just get caught up in their own dreams and lives. you have to be happy for them, but you might miss what you once had. i try to always remember, in any circumstance, living in the past will get you nowhere but lost in the future. the present will pass you buy and you'll miss out on so many great opportunities. digging up the past always gets you dirty.

it's important to not only keep your eyes forward, but to keep setting new goals as you achieve previous ones. they won't all be easy. some may never be accomplished, but that's ok. keep working. set new goals. you'll grow and learn and change, so should your goals. 

i'm blessed to have a close group of friends and family that continue to always support me in every aspect of the word. no matter how long i'm gone for, how often i call, how often we get to spend time together; when i do call, they always answer. they'll drop everything for a sandwich or a cold beer. having people like that in my life makes me stronger. it's a network that is always there reinforcing me and my dreams. no matter WHAT happens, win or lose, they love me. that's a huge part of who i am and why i am the way i am. i feel free to dream, try, jump, leap and fall... because no matter what, i am loved and supported. be this friend to someone else. surround yourself with these people. no matter how trivial or how badly you might not want to listen to someone "complain" it's what friends do. love and support each other. it's a cold world out there. we don't have to face it alone. much love those spreading the love, support and strength allowing me to laugh, learn, love and live. 

Jan 12 2013 - studio

today has been great already. i'm in a steady rhythm of my day to day, which i like. i love waking up regardless of where i am and having a productive start. wake up early, morning shake, morning cardio, breakfast, shower, then whatever i may have planned for the day. usually, this consists of email, twitter, facebook, PM workout, drumming, reading, walks around whatever city i'm in and of course, listening to music. today happened to be a beautiful 5mi run to lake michigan and the adler planetarium. such a view... listening to music helps reinforce a great lesson that i am a firmly believer of - keep an open mind... about everything/everyone. i love music of ALL genres (obviously i don't LOVE every artist). it all depends on my mood at that exact minute. this is a great way to view life too. i like to keep an open mind about people. color, race, religion, background, financial situation, those things don't define you. they may have a major influence on who you are, but i always like to at least find out. people are interesting. every one has such a unique and special story. i love it.
i apply this same open mind to food. i'll try anything at LEAST once, and i mean anything. craziest thing i've ever eat... probably the Filipino delicacy, beluit. (google THAT). i apply this thought to beers, new cars, new places, cities, bands... whatever i come across. TRY IT. give it a chance. doesn't mean you like it, but what IF you do. this theory kind of brought me to the thought of finding things you don't like which lead me to the idea of making mistakes. i think it's truly important to remember that EVERYone makes mistakes, and it's ok to, as long as you learn from them. this also ties in with losing, it's ok to lose or "fail" as long as you work harder, get better, and come back again even stronger! take a second to try some new things, keep an open mind, make mistakes and always remember that life is always better when you laugh, learn, love, and live it. much love.

Jan 11 2013 - Pushing and Pulling

in life it's inevitable, regardless of profession, that people are going to push personal beliefs and opinions on you. co-workers and ever more frequently superiors, will use their opinions and positions to influence you. sometimes this may be as simple as which tie, or in my case pants, to wear. after all, looking the part and looking professional is important. however, sometimes we have people pushing much more serious issues on us. people forcing us to do things that misrepresent who "we" are as individuals. keeping this relative to my life as a musician, i am told to "play ball" more than one could possibly imagine. i don't consider myself a rebel or a trouble-maker, so if it's best for the band, the guys or myself, i'll undoubtably "play ball". sometimes though, we're asked, or TOLD, to do things that i consider fake. untrue. misleading. and while they might not physically hurt anybody, they hurt my soul as a person. they damage what i stand for and believe in. i'm in a profession of art, isn't it supposed to be entirely based around my thoughts, beliefs and stances...? i'm not here to please EVERYONE, i'm here to express myself.
for the past 10 days we've been working diligently on our newest album. this album also happens to be my debut album with the band. this means a lot of things... it's a HUGE opportunity and moment for me to show the world who "i am" via drumming. this is what I** sound like. however, i am constantly forced to take in opinions from producers, band mates and management as to what THEIR opinions are on drums. (keep in mind they're not drummers.) i'm not writing this to complain, possibly vent for myself, but truthfully to shed light on what MY world is like. people not in bands don't know what our lives and profession entails. well i'll share. i'll share it all. gladly.
we face many of the same problems. we're not out here just partying and living it up. we have real responsibilities and real problems. daily. the studio thus far has been an amazing experience. i've been broken down and called out. told i'm not good enough. i need to do better. i'm not cutting it. i was given a choice. get better, or quit (recording the album and get a studio drummer). i could have easily said, yeah you're right, and given up. instead, i work every day for hours to get better. to be as good as i can possibly be. since then, i've tracked 9 songs. giving up will never get you anywhere in life. running away from problems isn't a solution. i realize there are times where walking away is your ONLY option, but that's your LAST option. this life is short, and if you continue to give up and run away, you'll never finish anything. unfinished business and loose ends is not a road to happiness or success. work hard and believe in you and what you love. i'll keep working to get better, i'll keep fighting with management and others everyday with what THEY think i should do haha, but realistically, we're going to meet in the middle and do what's best for everyone. that's how you succeed. lifting up the people around you. don't take on the world alone. love and support each other. work hard. laugh. learn. love. live.

Settling In

i've always been the type to set goals and work hard to achieve them. i also have always prided myself on adapting to my surrounding environment. currently, these two traits has crossed paths in a very positive manner. being in the studio drastically limits my contact with outside influence. i'm locked into a room with a specific group, working at a specific task, with very specific goals. this makes it exceptionally easy to set and achieve other personal goals. specifically, my training and diet routine. i'm on a fixed, low income, which limits my eating out. buying my own groceries not only saves me money, but makes it much easier to eat clean and healthy. with such a strenuous schedule, i'm very limited on time spent outside the studio, luckily, there's a gym in our "living room", making it impossible to NOT work out. this overall makes for a very efficient, happy, and healthy lifestyle. achieving goals and success also, naturally encourage a happy, healthy lifestyle. this helps me stay optimistic, eager, energetic and happy.
to review, your surrounding have a GREAT effect on your life. happiness begins with your environment/home. positive vibes, less distractions, healthy/active lifestyle all result in achievement and success, which strongly reinforces HAPPINESS. so, if you're unhappy with yourself or your current state in life, i greatly encourage setting a couple goals, eliminating negative energy and surrounding yourself with a comfortable environment. happiness in many ways is the key to life. and life is so much better when you laugh, learn, love, and live.

How Bad Do You Want It

everyone has a dream, or had one. many have given up on them, let them go, or tried to bury/forget them. some, very few, however, chase their dreams. it's nearly always a long, devastating and brutal road. it never comes easy. sacrifices will be made. tears will be shed. relationships will be made, lost, strengthened and destroyed. it will NOT be easy. 

4 years ago, i was at a point in my life where i was contemplating what it was i "wanted to do with my life". did i want to finish school? work in the music industry? perform music? start a business? get a 9-5 and make some money... then i was asked a question. a very simple question. "what would you do in life, if you were guaranteed not to fail at it?" i immediately answered "play drums". this meant devoting my life to pursuing this dream. this meant skipping weekend parties, playing every chance i got, spending money on equipment instead of beers or cars or clothes, it meant missing time with family, leaving behind relationships and friends... this was it. i was going after it. this was 4 years ago. i now play drums full-time in a "successful" rock band. this, to many, would be a success. it's not good enough for me. there's still too much more to accomplish. so far up to still climb. this past week in the studio has taught me more about drumming than the past year. i've learned how far i am from where i need to be. from where i WANT to be. more practice. more studying, notes, practice, listening, learning, PRACTICE. i want to be the best. you never stop being a student. and as long as you remember that, you remain open, eager and driven, NOTHING can stop you. don't let anyone else tell you what you can and can't do. you can do whatever you set your mind to. but i warn you - it will be beyond "hard". it will seem impossible more times than not. you will shed tears and maybe even blood. others will hate you for your decision. people will think you're crazy and selfish. those people are jealous. they didn't achieve their dreams. they probably never even tried... be different. be better. be unique. be YOU. work hard and have fun, so that when you look back on your life, you'll know that you took every chance to laugh, learn, love and live.